Kinda gross, but kinda cool
To get by in NYC, sometimes you gotta couch surf. For one man, however, 'couch surfing' is hard, wet, and filled with trash. Meet Jon Whitestone, a 49 year old homeless man currently stranded on a futon in the East River.
"When I woke up this morning, I knew something was wrong," said Whitestone, adding "The normal sound of my dumpster alarm clock was replaced with the deep, resonant blare of a tug boat's horn—talk about a rude awakening."
Wow. Poor guy.
Once Mr. Whitestone's jarring reality (being trapped without any method of communication or the ability to swim) set in, he began to panic and analyze his surroundings. Queens to the right, Roosevelt Island to the left. "Yep," exclaimed Jon, "I'm fucked."
Chances are, you won't come into contact with Jon because he's literally a homeless man floating in the East River; but if you do, please do not help him. He is a known drug-addict.