Barren down the hatches, this is going to be bad.
Reports came from Nevada early Thursday morning that after 167 dormant years the Hoover Dam’s nipples have started Lactating. God help us all.
“The last time this happened was one of the worst disasters in American history” said Director of Dam Operations Sarah Clemons, “We lost 1,567 people and the milk ruined the drinking water for half a century.”
No word yet on when the worst of the lactation will hit but specialists say it is best to be prepared at all times until the final gush of dam milk. God be with you.
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